Any combo of gender and sexuality identifiers are up for grabs. So you might identify as a queer pansexual dyke or pansexual aromantic or nonbinary pansexual.
You can identify as pansexual *and* other identities. Remember: Identities are like those Limited Too tanks you might have hoarded as a pre-teen. How does identifying as pansexual feel, compared to bisexual, queer, polysexual, or omnisexual?.How does identifying as pansexual make me feel? How does saying the word make me feel?.When I think about my ideal mate(s), does gender play a (big) role?.What are the genders of people I’ve historically been attracted to?.Have I developed attraction to someone without knowing their gender or pronouns before?.Spend some time noodling on, journaling, or talking through the following questions: Only you can determine if you’re pansexual, so figuring out whether you’re pansexual is going to take a little self-reflection. Then how am I supposed to know if I’m pansexual? “At the core, these two terms mean basically the same thing, but people have different relationships to the terms and how they have been and are currently used culturally,” Deysach says. Historically, some people identified as pansexual due to the fear that identifying as bisexual was invalidating to their nonbinary and GNC lovers. Time to bust a widespread myth: Bisexual does *not* mean attraction to men and women.īisexuality always has been and always will be inclusive of nonbinary and other gender nonconforming folks.
The big difference between the two orientations is that, generally, pansexuality implies gender neutrality, whereas bisexuality does not. (Because pansexual folks are attracted to all genders, they fall into the “or more” category). Both, for example, include attraction to two or more genders. Why does everyone lump pansexual and bisexual together?Ī few reasons! But before we get into them, let’s define bisexuality.Ī common definition of bisexuality says it’s the potential for attraction - romantically, emotionally, or sexually - to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree.Īs you can see, the two orientations are similar. “I just happen to be attracted to women, men, nonbinary folks, gender-fluid folks,” and so on. “Someone’s gender does play a role in my attraction,” says Jordan, a 30-year-old in Dallas, TX. “It all comes down to their personality and vibe.”īill, 21, of New York City, offers a similar sentiment: “I identify as pansexual because gender isn’t a defining feature in who I want to date, sleep with, or romance.”īut that’s not true for all pansexual folks. “Gender, genitals, and sex have no barring on who I’m attracted to,” says Rachel, a 29-year-old living in Hartford, CT. Some pansexual people say their orientation has nothing to do with gender. That pan-phobic assumption is as absurd as thinking a straight woman is attracted to every single man on the planet. The key phrase here is “ potential for attraction.” Someone who is pansexual is NOT attracted to every single human on the planet. Like all gender and sexuality identifiers, the definition of pansexual varies based on who’s giving the definition, says Jesse Kahn, LCSW-R, CST, the director and sex therapist at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in New York Cityīecause the prefix “pan” means all, a common definition of pansexual reads: The potential for attraction -romantically, emotionally, or sexually - to people of all genders, or to people all across the gender spectrum, says longtime sex educator Searah Deysach, the owner of Early to Bed, a pleasure product company in Chicago that ships worldwide.
First things first: What’s the exact definition?